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Acme • Burbank 'A' • Spring 10 56th Season • Champions

Dodging a Double Barrel Shotgun

Acme 24, Chupacabras 22

Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Ga

Posted by Robin Blomquist on February 4th, 2010

Since our return to Burbank at the end of 2008 we have won 47 games and lost 3. Two of those losses were last season and kept us out of the championship game in which the Chupacabras pounded on the Hustlers. Tonight was our first round meeting with the Chups and they gave every indication that they intended to defend their championship. With the Hurd in Hawaii it was up to Coachum to face the music on the hill against the visiting Chups. After a leadoff flyout to Leonel in left, the Chups started what would become a steady pattern of lined hits and hard grounders. We fortified their opening efforts with no play on a 15 foot popup, a mishandled hit to right center and a classic grounder between the pins before we finally came to the plate. They had batted 11 scoring 6 with a couple of flyouts and a strikeout looking. We came up and hit the ball just as hard but only scored two from a GMoney leadoff hustle infield hit and a lined Leonel dinger. The next three were lined right at the Chupa infielders. 6-2 in their favor.

Inning 2 is a leadoff walk, but a couple of grounders to Garey at short wrap it up with a double play, 6U and 6-3. Big Billy leads off with a hustle double; Ga follows suit with a rbi double and the bottom of the order all reach base and score to take the lead 7-6. The Chups lead off with a zoo homer and after a bobbled grounder and a few more liners including a gem down the 3B line, they are back up 10-7. JB has the perfect answer with a leadoff dinger lined into the gap in right center. Acme bats through the order and with five hits and a 3 run blast by the Rhino, Acme is still on top 14-10 after 3.

Inning 4 opens with a quiet comebacker to DK who is holding up very well on the mound. Coachum keeps it together as grounders turn into doubles and a throw back from the field bypasses 2 cutoffs. Another shot down the line at third gives them a couple of runs, but another comebacker to DK results in the rare 1-4-3 double play awarded on verbal interference. The runner was yelling in the face of Mongo. Bad idea. It gets a little weirder after Ga singles to drive in a Billy double. Sweats hits a moderate liner to the glove side of their second baseman who sees Ga naturally hanging close to first and Sweats dejected with his head down. The crafty 2B swats down the liner, picks up his dribble and gets a plum 4-6-3 double play to end the inning. More of a dusty play than a dirty one and like Freddie the ump pointed out: it only works if we do not run it out. Acme leads 15-12 after 4.

The Chups push harder in the fifth with more line drives. Their second liner backfires as Chad grabs it in the hot corner and whips it over to Ga at first to double down on a large leadoff runner. They keep hitting liners including a 3 run dinger to the Leonel zoo. We give them some bonus outs and bases as well. As Ga complains that the scoreboard should show us with 13 rather than 12 runs, Freddie explains that Acme is the home team with the 15-12 lead. Missing handles in the outfield and the infield and another tough popup give the lead back to the Chups 16-15. But again we answer the bell with a solo dinger by Coachum and DC drives in a GMark double so the Acme lead after five is 17-16.

Time is running out and the Chups hit like their hair is on fire. A lined single and a walk are cashed in with a lined shot to right center that cannot be fronted. 3 run dinger. A hard grounder into the 3/4 hole and a double into the 5/6 hole puts 2 more in scoring position. A fly out to Davey is the first out and his throw to third is close, but just late as the fourth run comes in. Another hard grounder past first is another run before the second out pops up to Chad. And a final line drive out to DC is another rbi double before Moch converts a grounder for the third out. Chupacabras 22 and Acme 17. Can you feel the drama? Can you sense the excitement? Me neither. But this is why we drive out to a chilly park with cold aluminum benches rather than park on the comfy sofa to watch those lovable losers on American Idol. JB leads off with a hustled infield hit and Billy follows suit. Ga hits a grounder that their second baseman cannot handle, much less turn into a dp this time. A fielders choice and a fly out to center have us down to our last out with only 2 runs across the plate, but the top of the order is more determined than ever. Garey mashes a triple to bring in two and the L train singles in GMark to tie the game. Rhino comes to the plate and he is a true American who does not believe in tie games. Canadians and communists and futbol players have tie games. Davey spanks a beauty into the zoo in right field and gives us a storybook finish with a 2 run homer. God bless America.

The offensive line was 628/590/1154. That is about a B grade and only good enough due to the efficiency of our base runners. We stranded only 2 in 6 innings thanks to 5 doubles, a triple and 5 homers [although 2 of the homers were leadoff solo shots.] We got perfect Steel Ball Award nights from the middle of the order. Batting sixth Billy Mulcahey led off the key second inning comeback with a double. He scored our only run in the fourth with another double. He singled twice to score a Game High 4 runs. Do NOT yell in his face.

Batting seventh Rob Garrett was part two of the one-two punch in the second inning comeback with his double. Ga singled again in the third and again in the fourth, reaching again in the final inning Comeback. So happy the spotlight hit Ga this week as that photo was just too good to waste. Congrats to our perfect pair.

Only four more with 600 plus nights to merit Iron Pellet Awards:

Leadoff boy Garey Mark did not violate our personal space tonight, but did violate the Chups with a leadoff single in the first, double in the fifth and a huge two out triple in the final inning Comeback. Good for 3 runs and 2 ribbies. A hard grounder to first and a lined out to short completed his 600 night. His night at shortstop was also not quite perfect, but also was more than enough to put a dent in the Chupa scorebook.

The second part of the Acme one-two lineup punch, Leonel Silva made certain the Chups did not come out of the first inning unscathed with his 2 run homer. Base hits in the third and the final inning Comeback all scored for a total of 3 runs and 4 ribbies. And the L train covered a lot of territory in left field.

#3 Davey Cassandra had himself a night. In the first inning he lined a rocket that was stabbed at second, but his stick was magic for the rest of the game. RBI singles in the second and fifth innings were warm-ups for his 3 run homer in the third and his game winning homer in the final inning Comeback. DC finished with two runs and a Game High 7 RBI. The only thing missing was a brass band and fireworks.

Batting last Danny Ketchum was the anchor on this bowling team. His second inning double and third inning single were key to those big rallies. His homer in the fifth tied the game for the fifth time. He finished with three runs and 5 ribbies. Not to mention taking the hill against our toughest competition these days and notching a strikeout versus a mere two walks. Solid stuff, Coachum.

Everybody else reached base twice and scored at least a couple of runs to maintain the Acme world order. With one exception. His new job is keeping him away from the ball field more often than not, but Chad Mochrie was able to sneak over tonight and do his part for us at third base. Unfortunately with a hard grounder to his counterpart and three various fly outs, the legendary Chad will have to haul the Acme Anvil around the production studios of House until he can make it back to the house of Acme.

Milestones/Records: Dave Cassandra had a two homer game for the 8th time in his career. That ties him with Guy Starkman's 8 twin homer games and brings his total to 86 in 195 games.

Danny Ketchum drove in his 600th RBI in the second inning. DK is second only to Chad and his 762 ribbies.

The Chups were firing with both barrels as they hit solid line drives including a few dingers. They played smart defense that kept them in the game the entire game. And as Coachum pointed out they got to the 10 run level before we did as the visiting team in the third inning to score first, win the first inning and reach 10 first [the Big Daddy Theorum to guarantee a win.] As I say, that holds true every time in the 728 game history of Acme [except once.] It holds true only about 95% of the time for our opponents. And while it is true that we cleared a big hurdle tonight, we still have not clinched the first round. The Hustlers are likewise 3-0 and can take round one with a win over us. Just like they did last season. It would be a shame to survive the Chupa shotgun only to be done in by the Hustlers Saturday night special. Go ask Alice. When she was this small.